Showing posts with label sports cliches. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sports cliches. Show all posts

Thursday, June 23, 2011

Cliché: jockeying for position

Meaning: racing/competing for position (example 1, example2)


Rewrite 1: jockeying for show, place, or win
Rewrite 2: dancing for last couple standing
Rewrite 3: elbowing for a place in the line
Rewrite 4: fighting over bargains at the sale
Rewrite 5: toe-stretching for tallest


Comment: This really boils down to competition, and there are many ways to win. How would you reword it?


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Thursday, June 16, 2011

Cliché: it's a game of inches

Meaning: a sport or effort with minimal gains or losses


Rewrite 1: it's a game of small advances
Rewrite 2: it's a game of not-quite-theres
Rewrite 3: it's a contest of minor gains
Rewrite 4: it's a match of major disappointments
Rewrite 5: it's a sport of near misses


More possible rewrites:


Rewrite 6: a game of barely movable objects
Rewrite 7: a game of well planted heels
Rewrite 8: a game of well defended options
Rewrite 9: a game of steel-staked positions
Rewrite 10: a game of hard fought lines
Rewrite 11: a contest of won'ts
Rewrite 12: a match between wills


Comment: This was a tough rewrite for me, trying to find new ways to recast the "inches" in a meaningful way. In the end, I decided to redefine the end-product and not the measurement. In the send batch of rewrites, I wrote about less sports-related efforts. Where would you have taken this?


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